shit bro i just wanted au shit

[feistytrader]

everyone's lives suck when they don't have ninja buddies to help them hold down decaying demon god things and get nasty curses

maybe wolf mom can help when she's done being dead

(wolf mom will not help)

Comments

[biteoffherhead]

Despite my will, my body is failing me. An agonizing death... a punishment I well deserve.

[feistytrader]

...No one deserves something like this.

[Not even Moro. Especially not Moro. She already had her agonizing death.]

[biteoffherhead]

For spreading the curse, for succumbing to becoming a demon and failing my duty. For failing to redeem myself and right my wrongs...

[Her lip curls, a faint growl, but she's no louder or tenser like she once would be. She has no strength to be so.]

[feistytrader]

...I should probably blame you. Be angry at you. If you didn't lose yourself, I wouldn't have this curse that's killing me over and over.

But being angry about it isn't going to stop me from being in pain. It won't keep me from dying.

Your pain doesn't have the power to make it go away either.

[biteoffherhead]

May I die so pitifully that they see fit to let me stay dead.

[There's anger in her tone, but more than anything... she sounds pleading. She's never once sounded pleading before, but it's there in her voice now. Silver is wrong, but she doesn't have the strength to be angry. She just wants to die. She wants to suffer, and hurt, and pay her dues... and she wants to never come back.]

[feistytrader]

[...Moro can't see it, but he nods in agreement- let death be death. No one deserves to keep dragging on like this.]

Is there anything I can do for you?

[biteoffherhead]

Yes.

[Her brows raise, and her ears weakly turn towards him. If she had eyes, they would be open and looking at him.]

You must never forgive me.

[feistytrader]

...I already have.

[biteoffherhead]

Do not. What I have done... I do not want to be forgiven. I do not want my sins to be accepted by anyone. They are a blight, a curse... just like the mark itself. I must not be allowed forgiveness for what happened.

[feistytrader]

...If I hold some kind of resentment towards you, it will consume me over and over again. If I let it go, it doesn't have as much power over me.

[In fact, he even pulls down one of his sleeves to look at it. Keeping calm's done wonders. This is the third time it's started to spread again, and by far the slowest...]

[biteoffherhead]

I do not speak of your resentment. I speak of your forgiveness. Whether you hate me, or fight your curse by pretending to be indifferent... that is your fate.

I do not wish to be forgiven.

[feistytrader]

[He's not pretending anything. He's tired. Too tired to be angry or hateful of fearful.

At some point, those feelings will resurface. For now...]

I don't understand.

[biteoffherhead]

Do not deny my responsibility for what happened. Do not reflect on it and say that I was free of blame. Do not forgive me for it.

[She chuckles, sadly and weakly.]

You are such a stupid boy...

[feistytrader]

I won't deny it. [He shouldn't. He knows better than that. This feels familiar to him- someone deeply hurting him, regardless of their reasons- but he's not sure why.] But I won't keep holding it against you, even if that makes me stupid.

[biteoffherhead]

Do as you wish, then. As long as I am held properly accountable. That curse is my greatest shame.

[And she doesn't want it to be dismissed as something that's 'okay' or 'not her fault'. She doesn't want to be forgiven for it by anyone, even if her zombie infection was the cause. She upholds her duty above all else, even rational reasoning, so she is stubbornly determined to be the one at fault for the curse.]